I’m better now. 
Cliff told me I’m cute when I’m all angry and worked up over stuff like this.
That made me feel a bit better. He said it’s a good thing I don’t let people just get by doing mean stuff to the kids.
Yay! Mom, the Kid AVENGER!!!!
So, my ex-husband came and picked up Marjorie and Ian a little while ago and they’re spending the night with him at his parents. He knows about the crap that happened today with Ian and they’re going to try and have fun tonight and not think about bad stuff.
I didn’t step out and speak or anything, just not in the mood and really I have nothing to say. These kids are nearly grown and they have very good judgment; they know what they’re doing. Just like me though, I notice he’s looking older.
Speaking of that, I don’t like for people I used to know to see me now. I feel like Max’s disability is aging me fast. I think I look older than 41. I’m actually very embarrassed by how I look. I’d like to get my hair done and ask someone to help me figure out what to wear to make this ugly fat body look prettier when we go out. Maybe even give me make up tips since I haven’t worn make-up in about ten years and don’t even own any anymore. But, I really can’t justify it yet, because I don’t go out of the house except to go to the grocery store, school, or doctor’s appointments…
Anyway, I’m done thinking about bad stuff for at least tonight. 
And man, I am so tired… 
I did get to play EQ2 for a little while today, but I haven’t been able to get back in. Max has me in the living room right now playing the “hand me” game. At least we’re not watching “The Wiggles: Lights, Camera, Action” DVD on repeat tonight. I think I start to lose my marbles halfway through about the sixth showing…. Tonight’s entertainment is Noggin… Whew…
Ian had been looking forward to a family get together his (now former) girlfriend invited him to a while back. It’s a long ride and he was supposed to go with her and her family at 4pm (first it was 12pm, then 1pm, then 3pm) today. Instead she messaged Ian on Yahoo and informed him that not only did her mother not want him to come but that she wanted to break up with him, just a few hours before he was supposed to go. I had Ian call her back. In a rare moment of pure unbridled anger, I spoke to her and told her that Ian had been looking forward to this all week and that she was obviously no better than Ian’s crazy last girlfriend and then I hung up the phone. About ten minutes later her mother called to speak to me, calling me by my ex-husband’s last name, by the way, which I haven’t been called in twelve years. She gave me all sorts of excuses and reasons and explanations and told Ian he could go as “friends”, etc., which, I mean , come on, that’s complete bullshit. But I NEVER APOLOGIZED. I mean, come on, this is the same girl who called Ian a stalker when he talked to her on the phone TWICE, back when they first started “dating”. I knew this was a bad idea then. I told him the next time she tries to come forward and be girlfriends with him to run away as fast as he can.
I also told both her and her mother that Ian passed up on a chance to go on a rare weekend visit with his dad to be able to go to this thing. Thankfully, they were able to rearrange the times around and he is going to be able to go after all with his dad and Marjorie. But, man, it turns out this bunch of folks are snobs to the hilt and never liked Ian in the first place. They (the grandmother and aunt) were even heard by his girlfriend and her best friend calling him names behind his back. Now, I admit we are poor folks, and I admit Ian does have a slight disability that is sometimes more evident than other times, but this girl was no great looker (not that my ugly self has room to talk) and her mother told me she has the same disability as Ian, NLD, but my son is good kid and very polite and tries hard to do the right thing always. So I spoke with this woman and I never backed down. And she barked at the girl the stuff I said, like when I said Ian missed out on a trip with his dad so he could go to this thing, she hollered it back at the girl. Then she said “(girl’s name) is not like (Ian’s ex-girlfriend’s name), and our family is certainly not like (Ian’s ex-girlfriend’s dad).” And of course, I’m thinking , “No, you aren’t because his ex-girlfriend’s dad thought Ian was a really nice and good boy and hoped he could help Ian’s ex-girlfriend change her ways.” (I felt sorry for Ian’s ex-girlfriend’s dad. He seemed like a nice guy that was stuck with a wild uncontrollable child who probably needed to be on medication.) This woman obviously never got to know the situation or evidently never asked any questions… Quite frankly, I think Ian is better off staying away from that fickle bunch. They are the kind of people who will never know or understand what they turned away until their daughter is pregnant to some scumbag they though was “the right kind of boy” and abandoned on their doorstep.
My problem now is that I am so mad I can’t let it go. I have bottled up fury in here and can’t calm down. Damn those people and their close minded snobbish selves. Geez…. I wanted to play EQ2, but I’m so pissed I can’t concentrate.
What will Max’s life expectancy be? Particularly now with the seizures. It never occurred to me before because they say Autistics live a normal life span, but now that we know he’s having seizures… Well, that changes everything. Cliff said to me today that yesterday terrified him, and you know it terrified me… Then he said we need to enjoy what we have today.
How did this happen? Why did this happen? Everything I have been so afraid of seems to be coming true.
I spent today sitting with Max in the living room after he got home from school playing the “hand me” game.
Max had a seizure at 11:15am this morning while in the car with his worker on the way to go swimming at the local college. His lips turned blue for a minute or two and he broke out in a cold sweat. Immediately afterwords he tried to go to sleep. She called 911 and they talked her through everything. Then she called me and I called his doctor. She then brought him home and we took him to the hospital in Wilmington, about an hour away as instructed by his doctor, but we were there for four hours in the waiting room. During the first hour he became himself again. One of his case managers met us at the hospital and tried to get us in quicker, but no one would listen. As you know, he gets out of control in an environment like that, so sure enough, he jumped out of the wheel chair and ran for the doors, which automatically open, and his worker ran after him and caught him before he got to the road. Our case manager saw the whole thing and told the hospital we were leaving and told our worker she is to take a seizure training class next week and then told me he might want to go with us to see our doctor on Monday. Maybe after all of this we’ll finally get CAP. *sigh* Probably not… In any case, he’s okay now. His blood pressure is fine, his temperature is fine, etc.
Whew. That was quite a scare.
By the way, Max has had four seizures that we know of, December 24th, 2008, February 14th, 2009, March 30th, 2009 and today, June 29th, 2009. Noted for future reference.
This is one available from the Wordpress website. It’s kinda nice. I downloaded about twenty of them, but this one suited me the best for now. It’s kind of light though. I guess that’s my only complaint. I like the image changer thing at the top. I put six or seven images in it and I will probably add more later. It looks more professional than my old one. Of course I like that…
I’ll talk about more stuff later. Gotta eat lunch and do some other stuff before I get to settle down.
stuff and things…
The EEG was a complete and total nightmare. Cliff has some pictures I can post later. It was a four hour wasted chunk of time. Max completely refused to cooperate. He went the entire day until nearly 2am that night on 2 and a half hours sleep. And he was into everything and being a total terror.
Fast forward to today. He started summer school today and did very well. Then his case manager came for a brief visit and that was a complete disaster too. First of all, I forgot she was coming so I hadn’t cleaned the first thing up yet. I had hat hair from sitting outside with my big floppy hat on while Max played after getting off the bus. He and I both were eating lunch when she called and were still eating when she pulled in the driveway. (I had to stop in the middle of my lunch to clean up ASAP!) Then, while she was here Max was terrible. I am so embarrassed. He NEVER eats lying down and he did while she was here. He never demands to sit next to guest unless it his grandpa or his worker and he stuck to his case manager like glue. He striped off his diaper right here in the living room in front of her and oh man, it just gets worse. He was awful the entire time she was here, but now of course he’s an angel, playing quietly with his beads. He did grab my laptop cords which he does do and isn’t supposed to, so we had to pull the vaccuum out tog et him calmed down. It was just a very bad visit. :( Now she wants his doctor to check him for Fragile X syndrome. *sigh*
I am so tired of all of this stuff. :( I wish Max would just calm back down some again…. I miss the days of tearing paper right this minute…. We did get a new phonebook today. Maybe he can be inspired to tear up pages for a while….
It isn’t easy dealing with this child…
In other news, Marjorie started work at the bakery today! Yay! She’s working at a small local bakery called Crazy Chics’ or something like that.
We haven’t started cleaning off the front porch yet. Today we looked it over to decide what should stay and what should go and what we need to start with. We’ve got a game plan now so Thursday we’ll head out there and get going for real. Marjorie is going to have to take the thrift store stuff for us tomorrow though…
Well, I have a list to write of daily problems with Max… That should take quite a long while….
But I’ve been noticing lately not only the sameness between Foxnews and CNN but also the differences between them. Today is an extremely interesting example (you’ll have to click the thumbnails to see what I’m talking about):
Notice the story about Hawaii at Foxnews? Every other story is mirrored on CNN except that one. In fact, the only thing I find related to the country in question on CNN is this:
North Korea qualifies for 2010 World Cup
Maybe they just haven’t caught up with Foxnews yet? In any case, I hope my cousin and her large family who happen to live in Hawaii are watching Foxnews and can get away should disaster happen….
In other news, the EEG is tomorrow morning. Wish us luck. We’re going to need it…
#186; In which Mittens acts typically
Okay, so I listened to “Boys of Summer” on Rhapsody, rather loudly, as I like to, since I do have a really cool soundsystem attached to this computer, and now Mr. 11 going on 18 over there decides to blast HIS music really loudly through his PC speakers. Geez… He turns and looks at me and grins. What a mess. 
Now I’m stuck listening to Choo Choo Soul for hours…
I thought it would dissipate, but it hasn’t, so again I have to recount tales of my former life as a teen to twenty-something and bring up a strong memory that bursts into my head when this tune comes on…
I remember the whole night, but the best bit for me was actually riding in his convertible, that big old ugly burgundy or dark red looking monster of a car, with the top down, cruising down Shipyard Boulevard in Wilmington… Back then the road died at night and it was if you were completely alone, a lonely car on a lonely stretch of road with music echoing off the buildings as we passed them. It’s not the person I’m thinking of here, but the feeling of flying with that top down and the feeling of excitement and freedom I had at the time. The most exciting thing that happens to me here is poo diaper changes on an 11 year old (trust me, it’s quite disgusting – I’m trying to force him to at least try the potty once for poo this summer but he’s very resistant) and cleaning up when guests are coming. Woo. Yay. Excitement. Woo. Anyway, I hear this song and I feel that exhilarating wonder that came from just getting away and escaping and pretending for a little while to be beautiful and desired. Oh well… “Those days are gone forever, I should just let ‘em go.” 
We are earnestly trying to teach Max potty training this summer. Wish us luck. Max resists with everything he’s got. And then, on top of that, we’ve got his EEG on Friday. Now that’s going to be exciting… 
Comments (0) 
